


Everybody Wants to Fall in Love (But Not Me)

by Willowe



Series: Romance is Boring [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Aromantic Tony Stark, Coming Out, Multi, Tony is bisexual but there's nothing explicit in this story, arophobia, fluff and humor and emotional hurt/comfort, romance-repulsed Tony Stark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-23
Updated: 2016-06-27
Packaged: 2018-07-16 22:16:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7286767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Willowe/pseuds/Willowe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Being aromantic was never a problem for Tony. He has a surprisingly healthy non-romantic relationship with Pepper and Rhodey and he's happy with that. So maybe that means he's also, technically, never had to come out to someone. That wouldn't really even be a problem, if his teammates could just get their heads out of their asses and piece things together without him having to actually say, <i>Hey, by the way, I'm aromantic and romance-repulsed, just thought you should know!</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Aggressively Arospec Week over on Tumblr. Title from "Don't Fall In Love" by Danko Jones.
> 
> 1/31/2017: Minor grammatical edits and some minor rephrasing to fit better with future stories.  
> 1/13/2018: Rewrote chapter 1 to fit better with later stories (see chapter note), and minor edits to chapters 3 & 4.
> 
> I promise I'm not going to make editing this thing a yearly tradition. Hopefully this is the last of it...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter One has been completely rewritten as of 1/13/2018 to fit better with later stories in the series. (More specifically, it has been rewritten so the relationship between Tony/Pepper/Rhodey is hopefully clearer to the reader, and fits with the backstory written in "The Thing to Fill the Void".)
> 
> The original version of Chapter One can be found [on my blog](http://willowenigma.tumblr.com/post/169678678665/ewtfil-original-chapter-one) in case anyone is interested in reading that.

“Pepper, I need you to pretend to date me,” Tony says as he bursts into Pepper’s office without warning or preamble, throwing himself down into the chair across from her desk and waiting for her to look up from her work.

Pepper, who is very used to Tony’s theatrics, finishes typing the sentence she had been in the middle of writing before saying, “Hello, Tony, it’s nice to see you too. Did you sign those documents I sent over, or are they still sitting on the desk in your workshop?”

“Pepper,” Tony says, and it’s not a whine but it’s still pretty damn close. Either way, it’s enough to finally get her eyes away from her screen and glancing over at him, so. Point to him. “I will get the documents back to you, signed and everything, I promise I will, but right now I need you to pretend to date me.”

“Oh, so I did hear you correctly then,” Pepper says. “I’m assuming, since I’m already technically in a relationship with you, by “pretend to date” you really mean “fake a romantic relationship”?”

“Yup.”

“No,” is Pepper’s immediate response. “Tony, you- you don’t do romantic relationships, and for a very good reason.”

“Correction, I haven’t done romantic relationships before but I-”

“Tony you have, very explicitly, told me that you are romance-repulsed,” Pepper interrupts. “I once made the mistake of trying to hold your hand without warning you first and you avoided me for twelve hours. You have spent the last four years violently protesting whenever Jim or I say that we’re “dating” you. Please explain to me how you want me to fake a _romantic_ relationship with you now in a way that will be at all convincing to another human being.”

Tony rolls his eyes. “Give me some credit. It’ll be fine. I’ve gotten better with that stuff, the hand-holding and shit, with you and Rhodey, haven’t I? Besides, you’re the alloromantic one here. I’m sure you’ll think of something.”

“Oh, I can definitely think of ways to convince people that we’re in a romantic relationship,” Pepper agrees. “But they’re not going to be methods that you’re comfortable going along with and, more importantly, I have no idea why you want to do this anyway.”

“There’s a…” Tony waves his hand, searching for the right words. “...a situation, of sorts. It’s nothing, really, but I just think-”

“That having me hold your hand and tell you that I love you will solve this problem?” Pepper cuts in. 

“Yes,” Tony says, stubbornly determined to see his admittedly hare-brained scheme through. 

Pepper rolls her eyes and reaches out to grab his hand, rubs her thumb back and forth along the back of it, sending unpleasant shivers down Tony’s spine, like the skittering of tiny spiders across his skin. “What are you doing?” he asks, suspicious, trying to ignore the way that the gentle contact with Pepper feels like pins being driven directly into his nerve endings. Even now, years after he’s adapted to his platonic relationship with Pepper and Rhodey, something about being touched like this when he isn’t prepared for it sends him spiraling. 

“Proving a point,” Pepper says. She smiles at him and Tony knows it’s a fake smile, knows that it’s an act, but the look on her face is too adoring, too _loving_ , and it makes Tony’s heart race. Pepper raises their clasped hands towards her mouth, as if planning on kissing Tony’s hand, and Tony immediately decides that he’s had enough. 

“ _Don’t_.” Tony pulls his hand away and scrambles back from the desk, putting almost the entire room between himself and Pepper without even thinking about it. He’s breathing hard and he’s not panicked, not quite, but he’s also _not okay_ with what almost just happened- even if he had, technically, goaded Pepper into it.

“I’m sorry,” Pepper apologizes immediately. Her voice is firm, but her eyes are soft as she adds, “but people are going to expect things like that if we suddenly announce that we’re dating. So you can see why this plan of yours might not be the best idea you’ve ever had.”

“Can’t we just release a press notice saying that we’re both off the market?” Tony asks, plaintively. The tension is slowly bleeding out of his frame, now that there’s distance between him and Pepper, but he doesn’t move back over to her. Not yet, at least. He knows that it’s going to take longer than thirty seconds for the subconscious part of his brain to recognize that she’s not about to start showing romantic affections towards him again anytime soon. “Wouldn’t that solve the problem?”

Pepper snorts. “No, Tony, no. Just- just no. I don’t even know what the problem here is, but I can promise that a press release announcing our relationship would not solve anything.”

Tony knows she’s right, and knows that she’s just humoring him now. “Well, I wish it could,” he mutters.

“No you don’t,” Pepper says. “Or else the three of us would have gone public with this years ago.” She rests her chin on one hand and studies Tony. “Talk to me. Why do you want people to think you’re in a romantic relationship, when you know as well as I do that this plan would never work?”

“Because it would solve everything, if I could just get my shit fucking reactions under control-”

“ _Tony_ ,” Pepper cuts him off, before Tony can really get going. 

Tony takes a deep breath, lets it out slowly. It’s a testament to how worked up he is that he’s letting this sort of internalized arophobia get the best of him. “I need people to think I’m dating someone, so they leave me the fuck alone.”

“It’s the Avengers, isn’t it?” Pepper asks, because it’s an easy conclusion to come to. The only recent change in Tony’s life has been the Avengers moving back into the Tower several months earlier. It’s not hard to see how they could be at the root of his new problem. “If they’re giving you a hard time about being aromantic, I’m going to have to strangle them. For your own good, you understand.”

“Of course,” Tony agrees. “It’ll be a shame to lose them- Cap especially, the country’s going to mourn the loss of a national icon like that- but it can’t be helped.” He finally moves back over to Pepper and sits down in the chair in front of her desk, kicking his feet up on the corner- the one that’s purposefully kept clear because she knows that he’s always going to do this- as he adds, “So I mean, it’s a good thing that you won’t have to strangle them because they aren’t, technically, being arophobic. In that they don’t know that I’m aromantic. They’re just… I don’t know, talking about relationships and watching rom-coms like normal people.”

Pepper blinks. “You haven’t told them that you’re aromantic?”

“Uh, no? Pepper, I thought you knew this- you knew they didn’t know about us, why would I have told them the one and not the other?” Tony asks, now a bit confused himself.

“I didn’t think about it, I suppose,” Pepper says. “We’ve always kept our relationship private. It didn’t seem strange to me to keep it a secret from them. But, Tony, you should tell them that you’re aro.”

“No.”

“Tony-”

“No, listen Pep, I’ve figured this out,” Tony says. “They just need to think I’m in a relationship so they think I’m off the market or whatever, and stop bugging me about romantic things. I can’t tell them about my actual relationship with you and Rhodey because I can’t explain the platonic thing without coming out, and I’m _not_ coming out. So the next best option is just to fake a romantic relationship with you to get them off my back.” Tony shrugs. “It’s flawless logic, and if you won’t go along with the plan I’ll ask Rhodey instead.”

“Have you considered that if they thought you were dating me- or Jim- it would only make things worse?” Pepper asks. 

“No…” Tony says slowly, drawing the word out. “No, no I haven’t, because it _wouldn’t_ make things worse…” 

Would it?

He had been assuming that if the Avengers thought he had a romantic partner in his life they would leave him alone. Particularly Steve, Natasha, and Clint, the ones who are unintentionally the worst and, coincidentally, all single. If they couldn’t tease Tony about being dateless like they are, what else would they want to bother him about? Now, however, he has a sinking feeling that he’s missing something that would be obvious to alloromantics- or at least, aro people used to dealing with friends bothering them about this stuff. Tony’s only frame of reference is how the press used to speculate about his love life, and he has a feeling that that’s not exactly applicable here.

“I hate to say it, but it would,” Pepper tells him. “They’ll just start asking you different sorts of questions- when we started dating, how we knew we were in love, what our plans for your _“favorite”_ holiday in February are, if we’re thinking about marriage-” Tony makes a face at that and Pepper sighs. “I know, it’s ridiculous and I hate being pestered like that too, but it’s what people do and asking them to not go prying into it is going to come across as a little odd.”

Tony drags a hand down his face, disappointment curling unpleasantly in his gut. “Why do you guys _always_ have to be like that?”

“I’m not apologizing on behalf of all alloromo people, Tony, we’ve had _that_ conversation before,” Pepper says dryly. “But I am sorry that your… let’s just say, _creative_ plan won’t work.”

“Yeah, so am I,” Tony mutters. “I didn’t exactly come up with a Plan B and I’ve absolutely had it with their bullshit. It’s been making the romance-repulsion so much worse than usual over the last few months and I don’t know how much more of it I can take.”

“I have noticed that you’ve been a bit more reserved lately,” Pepper admits, which is her polite way of saying, _You’ve been jumping out of your skin every time I try to touch you for the last month._ “In hindsight, it makes a lot of sense. It’s not like you typically spend an extended amount of time around other people-”

“Yes, thank you Pepper, I know I am either annoyingly reclusive or even more annoying superficial in my interactions with other people,” Tony interrupts. “No need to throw that in my face now.”

“That’s not what I meant, Tony,” Pepper says. “It’s just that… Well, you spend time with Rhodey and I but we know that you’re aro, and you tell us when you’re okay with that sort of affection and when you aren’t. The people you meet at social functions or the ones you take to galas as a cover, it doesn’t matter if they know or not. But of course it’s different when you have friends that you now have to come out to, really for the first time in your life.”

“I could just wait until one of them confesses their love for me, I turn them down, they go on an obsessive Googling spree and then storm into my workshop yelling about aromanticism,” Tony says with a smirk. “That worked so well for you.”

“Excuse me, I hardly professed love,” Pepper says, but she’s smiling and it doesn’t hurt to hear her say that word, not now when they can joke and tease each other about it. “And if I’m remembering correctly, and I know I am, I am the only reason I had to storm your workshop was because you never told me you were aromantic in the first place. You just told me that the thought of me having a crush on you made you want to vomit because you were, and I quote, _so repulsed by the idea of romance, seriously Pepper, either cut this shit out or find a new job_. It was an attempt at maintaining job security, that’s all.”

“Of course it was,” Tony says, humoring her.

“And anyway, that just proves my point that you could avoid situations like this if you just came out to your team-”

“No,” Tony says. “Not gonna happen.”

“Then at the very least you have to tell them that you’re uncomfortable with all the romantic talk,” Pepper says. “It’s your Tower. It was your home first, and you deserve to be comfortable in your own space.”

“Didn’t you just say that asking them not to talk about romantic relationships with me would come across as weird?” Tony reminds her. “How, exactly, do you think that conversation is going to go?”

“Well, considering the alternative is that you continue to say nothing and suffer in silence-”

“No, the alternative is that I run the fake-dating plan by Rhodey and see if he can come up with a way to dodge any comments from the team,” Tony interrupts. He’s joking… mostly, at least.

“Good luck with that,” Pepper tells him. “Please, for the love of god, do _not_ involve me in whatever debacle ensues if you and Jim are stupid enough to try that.”

“You are absolutely no fun,” Tony says. “You could at least give me another suggestion for something to try.”

Pepper gives him a pitying look. “You already know what I would suggest, and you’ve already said that you aren’t going to do it.”

Tony scowls and looks away from her. He’s not going to come out to his team, because it isn’t as simple as just “coming out”. 

Coming out as aro means educating everyone, because Tony knows the odds of them having heard about aromantic identities before are slim to none. (Hell, _Tony_ hadn’t even known there was a word for the way he felt- or rather, didn’t feel- until Pepper had enlightened him.) 

Coming out means answering questions, probably invasive questions, almost definitely things that Tony doesn’t want to get into and shouldn’t have to share just to get his teammates off his back. 

Coming out means risking that they won’t be okay with this, that things will go to pieces and the team will cause more problems for him than they already are. Tony wishes there was a magical solution where he can open up to the team and guarantee that things won’t go to shit, but there isn’t and the worst-case scenarios _terrify_ him. It’s not a risk that he’s willing to take- not now, and possibly not ever.

“I’m gonna work here for a little bit,” Tony says abruptly, and he knows that he’s not being subtle about changing the topic of conversation but he doesn’t care.

Pepper is kind enough to go along with the sudden announcement without question. “Good. This way I know the paperwork I need you to sign won’t mysteriously get lost in the workshop and I can actually turn it in on time. For once.”

Tony groans, but it’s mostly theatrical instead of serious- just like he knows that Pepper is actually teasing him about paperwork, instead of actually being annoyed. He takes the tablet that Pepper passes over without complaint and settles down to start reading through documents, only occasionally speaking up to ask Pepper a question or two.

This is, in Tony’s not-so-humble opinion, infinitely better than being back upstairs on the Avengers’ communal floors and being forced to listen to his teammate’s tease Steve about not having a date. And after an hour or so, when his skin has finally stopped crawling from Pepper’s earlier touches, he nudges his foot forward and taps Pepper’s arm. Without prompting or hesitation Pepper moves, adjusting her position so she has her arm draped across Tony’s legs while she works. She doesn’t look over at him, she doesn’t smile at him like she’s expecting more from this (because she isn’t), and Tony lets himself relax even more.

This is what he’s missing with his team, these sort of easy touches and the accompanying knowledge that it isn’t flirting, it isn’t romantic, it’s not going to go anywhere. He can’t do it with them, because they don’t know, and he can’t do it with Pepper or Rhodey where the team could see and get the wrong impression. But here, in the safety of Pepper’s office, he can let himself have this small comforting touch without having to worry about fending off comments later.

Because at the end of the day, it’s always the comments that are the worst and that’s the crux of why Tony doesn’t want to come out. He knows that even if everything goes well, the team’s well-meaning remarks would still manage to find his weakest points and jab right at them, to say nothing of the possibility of confusion and misplaced concern, or pitying looks, or-

Tony’s had enough time to settle into his identity. He knows he’s not broken, at least not because of this- but he knows that not everyone tends to think the same way. And there’s no way in hell he’s going to come out to the Avengers and give them an opening to hurt him like that.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone who left comments/kudos on the first chapter! I was very hesitant about posting this, but I'm so glad it's been well-received so far!
> 
> The next chapter will be up tomorrow. Thanks for reading!

“No, Natasha. I’m not interested.”

Natasha huffs, but it sounds more amused than annoyed. “You don’t even know anything about her, Steve.”

“Because it’s a blind date and you won’t tell me anything,” Steve reminds her. “I’m not interesting in going to dinner with someone I know nothing about.”

“So you’d go out to dinner with her if it wasn’t a blind date, then?” Natasha counters. 

Steve laughs.

Tony grits his teeth and really regrets not pouring whiskey into his coffee this morning.

It isn’t that Tony actively hates romantic things when they don’t involve him. Hell, he doesn’t even always hate romantic things when they do involve him; for all that he clings to the romance-repulsed label, he’s fine with holding hands and snuggling and kissing people when it’s on his terms. And when he can guarantee that they aren’t going to interpret the gesture as romantic attraction on his part. Which is why, really, he’s only fine with stereotypically romantic activities when they’re with Pepper and Rhodey, safely hidden from public view. 

It’s just that this shit is never ending. Ever since Steve and Natasha showed up at the Tower after D.C., dragging a now-jobless Barton with them, it’s been one wisecrack after another. Tony knows that it’s some sort of inside joke between them but Natasha is also somewhat serious in her attempts to set Steve up. And Steve isn’t exactly dissuading her, and somehow it’s turned into a team-wide effort, and-

And it’s fucking frustrating, okay? Because Tony doesn’t want to participate in this, not one bit, but even if he did he just doesn’t  _ get _ it. He understands being physically attracted to people, but he doesn’t understand the desire to date them, to take them out to nice restaurants and get to know them and  _ woo _ them-

Except apparently no one fucking says  _ woo _ anymore, which was news to Tony when Clint started laughing at him the one and only time he tried to join the conversation. Tony doesn’t even have the right vocabulary to attempt to participate in whatever team-bonding ritual this HR harassment suit waiting to happen has become and yeah, okay, maybe he’s more bitter about this than the situation actually calls for but can you blame him? This is his Tower, and he has to deal with deranged archers laughing at his lack of romantic knowledge in his own home. Of course he’s going to be a little angry about that. 

In hindsight, it’s a good thing Pepper shot down his fake-dating plan. Clint would’ve taken one look at them together and started laughing hysterically and the ruse would’ve been over immediately.

“Come on, who here would actually go on a blind date?” Steve is asking, and he’s laughing as he glances around at Natasha, Clint, and Tony. Thor is on Asgard (probably, they’re never really sure) and Bruce is still holed up in his lab, so it’s only the four of them in the kitchen this morning. Which is bad, because it means Tony is an easy target and sure enough, Steve turns to him directly and asks, “What about you, Tony? You’d ever go on a blind date?”

“I don’t exactly go on dates, Cap,” Tony says with a forced smile. “Don’t you know? I’m the paparazzi's favorite perpetual playboy.” It’s a reputation that doesn’t bother him because the gossip rags have, for the most part, accepted that he’s apparently never going to settle down and have stopped speculating on his love life. Which is always Tony’s preferences when it comes to third-rate journalism about his personal affairs. 

Clint is snickering in the background but Steve just looks… well,  _ sad _ , and Tony makes no attempt to resist the urge to roll his eyes. “Stop it, don’t give me that look,” he snaps. “Jesus fucking christ, I don’t want to date people. I am perfectly happy not dating people. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

“Don’t you get tired of having a revolving door of one-night stands?” Natasha asks, and she has that look in her eyes, the look that says he’s about to become her new project and- no. Just no. “I know someone I think you’d be great with, I could set you-”

“No,” Tony interrupts. “No, no,  _ no _ , do  _ not _ set me up on a date, Romanov. I don’t want to date. I have no interest in dating.”

“It would be a good way to meet new people,” Steve says. “Maybe make a new friend-”

“I don’t need new friends.”

“Meet a new fuckbuddy then,” Clint says with a wide, amused grin, ignoring the glare Steve sends his way. “Even you can’t say no to that, Stark.”

“Uh, yes I can. I absolutely can,” Tony says. “Because no, no I do not need to go on a date or meet anyone. I do not need new friends, or new partners, or new  _ anything _ . The only thing I  _ need _ is for you three to stop trying to pry into my personal life!”

“So there is a personal life to pry into then, is there?” Natasha says slyly, with a tone that means she thinks there’s more than just a string of one-night stands.

Tony is really,  _ really _ regretting not pouring whiskey into his coffee this morning. 

“There is nothing to pry into,” he says, enunciating each word carefully to stop himself from just screaming. “There is nothing to pry into because I don’t date. I never have, and I never will, and I never want to. So drop it, all of this, just- just fucking drop it.”

“Everyone dates, though,” Clint says. “Like,  _ everyone _ .”

“Not me,” Tony bites out. 

Steve’s nodding along with Clint though and he says, “Even if you haven’t before, you should give it a shot. Casual sex is great, but a relationship is more-”

“Oh fuck me sideways, I am not doing this,” Tony snaps. “I am not standing here in my own fucking kitchen listening to Captain fucking America lecture me about the benefits of a fucking relationship over casual  _ fucking _ sex.”

“That was a lot of  _ fucking _ ’s for one sentence,” Natasha says with a raised eyebrow. 

“Because I hate,  _ fucking _ hate romance and you won’t stop bringing it up,” Tony snarls, his already frayed patience finally snapping. “And no, that’s not an invitation to go prying into my business. I don’t have a traumatic relationship in my past to cry to you about in some bullshit Hallmark moment, I just  _ don’t fucking date _ .”

Everyone’s eyes are wide with surprise at his outburst, as if they’re just now realizing that they’ve crossed a line from friendly teasing into something else entirely, and Tony can’t take this anymore. He downs the rest of his coffee in one gulp, slams the mug back down on the counter, and storms out of the kitchen. 

“Jarvis, lock down the workshop as soon as I’m inside,” Tony orders as the elevator descends down to the middle of the Tower. “Unless the world is literally ending I don’t want to be disturbed by anyone.”

“Does that extend to Ms. Potts and Colonel Rhodes as well, sir?”

Tony has to think about that one. They’re his two usual exceptions to the workshop lockdown, but he’s pretty sure Rhodey is still out of the country (most likely, he has a half-memory of Rhodey mentioning having leave coming up but nothing’s been discussed since then) and he’s not sure he wants Pepper anywhere near the Tower right now. He knows that her threat to strangle the Avengers was mostly a joke, but he also knows that she absolutely would storm over here and rip them a new one without hesitation. 

Still, he tells Jarvis and says, “Nah, keep the usual protocols in place. And… get Pepper on the line? As long as she’s not in a meeting or something.” If he's lucky, he can head off her anger now- and maybe, hopefully, talking this over with her would calm him down as well.

There’s a momentary pause from Jarvis, long enough for the elevator to stop at Tony’s workshop and for him to scuttle inside to safety. “Ms. Potts is on her way to the airport, however she assures me that she has time to speak to you,” Jarvis finally says. He’s already started locking down the workshop as well, and Tony breathes a sigh of relief at finally being alone. “I am connecting you to her now, sir.”

Tony sits down on a stool by one of his workbenches and pulls a half-finished Iron Man gauntlet over towards him. “So, Pepper,” he says when the call goes through. “If I, hypothetically of course, told my teammates that I don’t ever date and then, maybe, went off on them a little, what are the odds that they’ll pull the same stunt you did and start Googling shit so I don’t have to have a conversation with them about this ever again?”

Pepper sighs. “Oh, Tony…”

“Look, it’s not a big deal, it’s just...” Tony shrugs, even though she can’t see it- no video on this call, just the audio and yeah, Tony might have done that on purpose. “They’re fucking killing me here, Pep.”

“I know, Tony,” she says soothingly, even though she doesn’t, not really.

And for a split-second Tony almost wants to get angry at her about that, angry that she doesn’t really understand and that he’s alone in this, because everyone he knows is alloromantic and even if they mean well they will never actually get it. But Pepper deserves better than that, and Tony has had enough of being overwhelmingly angry for one day. 

So he pushes past that, clears his throat, and says, “So, come on, answer the question. Nosy teammates. Googling. What are the odds?”

“Probably not good,” Pepper admits, and she sounds apologetic about that. “No offense Tony, but with your reputation the way it is just telling someone that you don’t date isn’t going to raise any questions.”

“Neither will a little bit of angry shouting on my part.” Tony sighs and pulls up the schematic for the gauntlet, and focuses his attention on a section of the wiring. “Well, what are my odds that the shouting will get them to leave me alone for a bit?”

Pepper hums, thinking it over for a moment. “Steve will probably feel bad about it. Natasha and Clint could go either way, to be honest. They’ll either back off, or tease you more trying to get another reaction out of you.”

“Fucking wonderful.” Not that Tony was expecting anything different. He loves his teammates, he does, he’d give his life for them in a heartbeat, but… He showed them his weakness, his gave them an opening. It’s only in their nature to go prying for more information. 

He doesn’t blame them for it, would  _ never _ blame them for wanting answers to their questions- not after the lies of HYDRA and SHIELD and the Red Room- but he still hates it. 

This is why he never wants them to know about this part of himself. Because they may mean well, but they won’t understand and Tony doesn’t think he’s capable of handling the interrogation that he knows would follow any coming out.

“So, Pep, where do I go from here?” he asks. “Is it too late to change my name and flee the country so I never have to speak to them again?”

“Why go through all the trouble when you can just take one of your armors anywhere you want?” Pepper teases. There’s a pause, and then, “Do  _ not _ take your armor out, Tony, that was a joke.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” Tony says. Flying away in the armor would only draw more attention to the situation anyway, which is the exact opposite of what he wants. “But seriously, Pepper…”

“Seriously, Tony, you need to talk to them,” Pepper tells him and Tony rolls his eyes, thankful that she can’t see the gesture. ”They aren’t just magically going to figure out that you’re aromantic unless you actually talk about your romantic orientation with them.”

Tony groans; that’s the last thing he wants to do. “Shouldn’t that be obvious from me shouting about how much I hate dating?” 

“No, that just means you hate dating,” Pepper says. “Which, again, is not surprising given your reputation and unless you give them an actual  _ reason _ about why you hate romantic things they’re not going to assume that it’s because you’re aromantic.” 

There’s the muffled sound of someone else speaking in the background and a quiet response from Pepper that Tony doesn’t bother listening to because, honestly he doesn’t care enough to put in the effort. And Pepper’s happier when Tony doesn’t try to pry into the minutia of her life anyway.

“I’m at the airport, Tony, I’m sorry I-” Pepper starts to say.

“Nah, it’s fine,” Tony interrupts. “I have projects to work on anyway, a new armor prototype to finish, things to get done.”

“Rhodey should be going on leave soon, I’ll send him a message to stop by the Tower, okay?” Pepper tells him.

So Rhodey was going to be stateside soon after all. That was always fun. “Sending my favorite boy toy my way, Pep?” he teases, already grinning widely at the thought of seeing his friend again. “I knew I liked you best.”

Pepper laughs, but knows better than to dignify that comment with an actual response. “Will that be all then, Mr. Stark?” she asks instead and it’s fond and amused, and the caring note in there is the closest thing to a loving tone that Tony will ever tolerate.

“That will be all, Ms. Potts,” Tony says, and the phone call disconnects. 

The workshop is silent for a few seconds as Tony, honest to god, debates the merits of going upstairs and trying to talk to his teammates. It would make Pepper happy if he did, and he likes making Pepper happy. And maybe she was right, that it would go well for him and he’d be comfortable in his Tower again, but… 

It might not go well. 

It might go well but they could ask questions, they could keep prying, they could start treating him like he’s broken, like he’s something that needs to be fixed, like all he needs is a couple of good dates and he’d be “normal”. 

It might get  _ worse _ , if he tried to come out. 

“Jarvis, put my music on, and show me what I have done for this upgraded repulsor system,” he says, swiveling his chair around to face the new holographic schematics that appear. 

He has work to do, important work that needs to be finished. He doesn’t have time to have a coming out crisis. Not now and preferably not ever.


	3. Chapter 3

Tony rubs at his eyes with the back of one hand while continuing to type out a long string of code with his other hand. He knows he’s been awake for too long but he is  _ so close _ to finishing the HUD updates for the newest armor. It would go faster if he had a little bit more caffeine in his system, but the cup of coffee that he downed about an hour ago is curdling unpleasantly in his stomach; he’s pretty sure that something in there had spoiled since he poured it an unknown amount of time ago, and he’s not sure if adding more coffee to the mix is a good idea at the moment. He wants to finish these upgrades, not lose two days huddled around a toilet with food poisoning.

“Jarvis, run the- the thing, for the correction and the- the new calibrations…” God, Tony is exhausted. Contrary to what his teammates seem to think, he doesn’t always enjoy days-long engineering binges. Sometimes they’re fun, sure, but mostly they’re just necessary so he can finish up one project and move on to the next. 

And there was always a next project. 

Besides, right now a little sleep deprivation is preferable to dealing with the rest of the Avengers. Especially considering Jarvis has been blocking their attempts to access the workshop for the last sixty or so hours. Tony knows he’s going to have to talk to them at some point, but he’s still not coming out to them no matter how much Pepper may insist that it’s the best plan. Which leaves him with exactly no idea what he’s going to tell them when he finally emerges from the workshop.

“Sir, if I may suggest-”

“Sleep, yeah Jarvis, I know,” Tony says around a yawn. “I just need to finish the… the, uh…”

“Do you even remember what you’re working on?” a new voice asks and Tony’s head jerks up in surprise. For a moment he thinks that he’s finally succumbed to exhaustion-induced hallucinations because obviously he has to be hearing things, but then the newcomer says, “Come on. Turn around, Tones,” and Tony does. 

Rhodey’s standing there, looking as exhausted as Tony feels, but the smile on his face is genuine and the duffle bag at his feet means he’s going to be around for at least a few days and yeah, this is exactly the sort of thing that a sleep-deprived Tony would imagine up. But Rhodey chuckles and says, “Really? I decide to surprise you like this and I get nothing for it?” and Tony is moving immediately, wrapping his arms around his partner and hugging him tight and yeah, this isn’t a hallucination. 

Thank god for that. 

“How the fuck did you get in here without me knowing?” The question is muffled against Rhodey’s shoulder, where Tony has his face buried in the crook of Rhodey’s neck. “I had the workshop on complete lockdown, Jarvis should have let me know when you showed up.”

“I bribed Jarvis to let me in unannounced,” Rhodey tells him with a laugh. 

“Corrupting my AI, are you?” Tony shakes his head, or at least as much as he can without lifting it up. “That’s just rude. What did you even bribe Jarvis with?”

“The promise that I’d get you out of the workshop and into an actual bed,” Rhodey says and Tony laughs because of  _ course _ that would be what it would take to bribe Jarvis. 

“Gonna have to rewrite your code, J,” he calls out, but he lets himself get bustled towards the door without complaint, though he does frown when he’s forced to let go of his death-grip on Rhodey so his friend can pick up his duffle bag off the floor. 

“I will pencil it into your schedule, sir,” Jarvis replies and Tony laughs, nearly tripping over his own feet from the lethal combination of distraction and exhaustion. 

“Can’t believe you turned Jarvis against me,” Tony mumbles. Rhodey has one arm slung around his waist to help hold him up, a familiarity that Tony doesn’t tolerate from very many people. Really just Rhodey and Pepper, and the rest of the Avengers if it’s a life-threatening situation of some sort. But it’s nice being this close to Rhodey, to be able to lean against him and wrap his own arms around Rhodey’s waist without having to worry about his feelings being mistaken for something romantic. 

It’s nice when Rhodey absentmindedly kisses the top of his head, while they wait for the elevator to deposit them at Tony’s floor, and Tony doesn’t have to worry about it meaning something more. It’s even nicer when he can sleepily mutter, “Maybe don’t do that. Right now, at least,” and Rhodey just nods and tells him, “Sorry. Let me know when it’s okay,” without kicking up a fuss about it.

The elevator doors open up on Tony’s floor and Rhodey nudges him out gently. “You need help making it to the bedroom?”

Tony chuckles and tightens his grip on Rhodey. “I’m too exhausted to tell if that was a come-on or a serious question about my ability to find my own bed,” he admits. “C’mon. You’re spending the night up here.”

“You sure about that?” Rhodey asks as he carefully starts navigating them across the apartment towards Tony’s bedroom.

Tony rolls his eyes. “Just sleeping. Too tired for sex. Save it for the morning.”

“That’s not what I-” Rhodey sighs. “Pepper talked to me, and-”

“Oh god,” Tony mutters. 

“-and I just don’t want to make you uncomfortable,” Rhodey continues, ignoring Tony with ease. “From the sounds of things, it seems like your team is doing enough of that already.”

“Please tell me Pepper didn’t send you here to strangle the Avengers while she’s out of the country.” It’s a joke, mostly, but Tony seriously does not need his partners teaming up to go after the Avengers. That would definitely just make the situation worse.

“They’d deserve it if I did.”

Tony sighs. “Rhodey…”

“I’m not gonna do anything, Tone. Promise.” Rhodey nudges open the door to the bedroom and deposits Tony on the edge of the bed. His hands flutter around Tony’s shoulders, like he wants to help Tony get undressed but isn’t sure if he’s allowed. 

Tony rolls his eyes and grabs Rhodey’s hands, guiding them to the hem of his shirt as he toes off his shoes. “If you’re going to be weird and awkward about this, you can sleep in a guest room,” he says irritably. “Seriously, cut this shit out. The last thing I need is for you to make things awkward.”

“I just don’t want to make you uncomfortable,” Rhodey repeats, and there’s guilt in his voice that shouldn’t be there because he’s never made Tony feel uncomfortable, at least not since Tony started this platonic relationship with him and Pepper. And even before then Rhodey was always his safe haven, through college and Iron Man and that heart-stopping night when Tony thought he was going to lose Pepper because of her crush on him. Rhodey has always been there, even when Tony doesn't deserve him.  


“You won’t,” Tony tells him. “I want you stay here. I can’t promise I’ll cuddle tonight, but I was not joking about morning sex. And we’ll see where we go from there.” He grins up at Rhodey. 

“Okay,” Rhodey says softly. “I can do that.”

Tony knows that if this was some Hollywood romantic blockbuster, this would be the point where Rhodey kisses him gently, tucks him lovingly into bed and curls around him as they both fall asleep. Which, gag. 

Instead, Rhodey teases him about having put on a few pounds and Tony bitches about his feet smelling and they fall asleep under separate blankets with a few feet of space between them. No goodnight kiss, no sickening pet names, no gazing lovingly into each other’s eyes as they fall asleep. 

It’s fucking perfect, actually. 

And the morning sex is even better. 

It’s nearly lunch by the time they leave the bed, but they don’t stray farther than Tony’s kitchen and the living room on his private floor. Tony insists that he’s not purposefully avoiding the rest of his team- although he absolutely is, and Rhodey knows it too- but that he just wants to spend some time with Rhodey without his teammates around to bother them. 

Of course, Rhodey takes this as an invitation to talk about the current situation with the rest of the Avengers and, yeah, Tony probably should have seen that one coming. 

“I’m just saying, man, maybe Pepper’s right on this,” Rhodey says around a mouthful of food. “Just tell them the truth, get them to lay off the romantic crap when you’re around. What’s the worst that could happen?”

“Uh, I could come out to them and they could start thinking that there’s something wrong with me that they need to fix by setting me up on a date? They could ambush me with questions about my romantic identity every five minutes? They could-”

“Okay, okay, jesus, I get it,” Rhodey interrupts. “So what’s your plan here then?”

Tony shrugs. “Honestly I’ve been hoping that they’ll just figure it out on their own but so far, no luck.”

“Yeah, that’s not gonna happen,” Rhodey says with a snort. “You do realize that Pepper is an outlier here, right? Like I didn’t even know this shit about you until she said something.”

“But you didn’t bother me about it they way they are,” Tony points out. 

“Because when I met you, you were like thirteen and surrounded by college kids,” Rhodey reminds him. “Who the hell was I going to try to set you up with? I was more worried about making sure you didn’t die of alcohol poisoning to fight with you about going on dates. And we both know I wasn't a saint, later on. Besides, it’s not like I was ever in a hurry to settle down either.”

Tony grins. “Pot meet kettle, huh?”

“Something like that.” Rhodey chuckles. “Look, my point is, they probably aren’t gonna figure this shit out on their own. And it sucks, man, I know it does, but what would be worse? Them knowing and being assholes- at which point I think you’d have every right to kick them out of  _ your _ Tower- or them not knowing and you continuing to be miserable?”

“Do you mean, them knowing and me selfishly tearing the team apart over this, or them not knowing and me being a mature adult and dealing with this on my own?” Tony counters.

“Yeah, and how is dealing with this on your own working out for you so far?” Rhodey asks, his voice dripping with sarcasm. 

Tony flips him the bird and takes a bite of his food. “Screw you, Rhodey. I’m managing this just fine.”

“That why I found you locked in your workshop when I got here?”

“I was working on important armor upgrades and didn’t want to be disturbed!”

Rhodey laughs and shakes his head. “Sure, Tony. Whatever you say.”

Tony wads up his napkin and throws it at Rhodey’s head. He misses by a lot, but Rhodey is still laughing and Tony’s not as irritated as he’s pretending to be, and all things considered this is a pretty good morning. “So, hotstuff, what are your plans for the rest of the day?” he asks, tossing his takeout container onto the coffee table and relaxing back into the couch. 

Rhodey shrugs. “Don’t have any, really. Should probably say hello to your team at some point, though, before they come barging up here and bothering us.”

That is the last thing Tony wants to do with the limited time that he gets to spend with Rhodey. But, then again, maybe having Rhodey around will stop the others from asking too many questions. Maybe Rhodey’s presence will mean that he doesn’t have to come up with a better excuse than,  _ Sorry got distracted working on my new armor _ . 

So he says, as casually as he can manage, “Yeah, sure, of course. Probably should go head them off soon. One of them was bound to see the War Machine armor down in the garage- that is where you left it this time, isn’t it?”

Unfortunately his casual tone has never been enough to fool Rhodey. He frowns and says, “We don’t have to go down now, Tones, I didn’t mean-”

“Nah, let’s do this.” Tony stands up and tugs Rhodey to his feet as well, nearly upending a few empty takeout containers in the process. “I mean, if you’re up for dealing with them now, that is. We can get it out of the way and come back up here to…” He waggles his eyebrows, the gesture intentionally exaggerated, and Rhodey laughs, pushing him away.

“Idiot,” he says fondly. “Yeah, come on. Let’s go play nice with the Avengers."

“Yes, let’s  _ actually _ play nice,” Tony tells him, trailing behind Rhodey as they head towards the main elevator. “Seriously, Rhodey. Don’t glare at them, don’t threaten them, don’t do anything. I don’t care what Pepper told you-”

“And who says that Pepper told me anything?” Rhodey says, all faux-innocence as the elevator started descending towards the communal floors. 

“You said it, last night,” Tony reminds him. “No idea  _ what _ she told you, but you two definitely are up to something. Which is absolutely not fair or called for, just for the record.”

“Hey, someone has to look after you, make sure you don’t cause too much trouble when no one’s looking,” Rhodey teases.

Tony shoves at him playfully and Rhodey, laughing, traps him in a tight bearhug, pinning his arms to his side so he can’t retaliate. He mock-bites Tony’s neck and Tony yelps, trying to kick his shin and cursing up a storm even as he’s laughing now too. 

And that’s when the elevator doors open onto the communal floor- and Steve, Natasha, and Clint all look up at the commotion, staring at Tony and Rhodey who are still tangled together in the elevator. 

“Fuck,” Rhodey swears under his breath. He lets go of Tony, and Tony puts distance between them immediately. 

He can feel his face heating up and, worse, he can feel his stomach start to twist, can feel the uncomfortable prickling along the back of his neck that always happens when his romance-repulsion takes a turn for the worse. He knows what it must have looked like to his teammates, seeing him tangled up with Rhodey like that, and it makes him sick with anxiety and nerves and a desperate need to push all romantic things as far away as he possibly can.

Rhodey’s been on the receiving end of this before and Tony knows it doesn’t bother his friend when he instinctively puts that distance between them. But Tony’s never had this happen in front of his teammates because he’s been so damn careful about not letting them see him with Pepper or Rhodey like this. And he realizes, a split-second too late, what his reaction actually looks like: embarrassment, over having a relationship found out. And even if, in the most technical sense possible, that is what happened Tony knows that his teammates are going to jump to romantic- and therefore blatantly false- conclusions. 

It’s Steve who recovers first, of course it is, moving across the room to greet Rhodey after he and Tony stumble out of the elevator. “Good to see you, Colonel Rhodes,” he says cheerfully. “Glad to see you finally coaxed Tony out of his workshop.”

Tony should say something. Should make some sarcastic quip, a snarky one-liner,  _ something _ to get this situation back to normal parameters. Something that he could handle. But his brain had stalled out and was refusing to cooperate, stuck in the vague panic of knowing that the romance jokes were going to be coming and not being sure how to stop it. 

Rhodey is smiling politely at Steve, not quite genuinely but not so fake that the good Captain would really notice. “Well, someone has take of him sometimes, right?”

Tony winces at that and sends Rhodey the best glare he can manage because, seriously? That is not playing nice. 

Steve pauses for a moment, like he’s trying to think of a way to reply to that without escalating the situation, and Natasha comes to his rescue. “We were locked out of the workshop,” she says with a shrug. “So we assumed that he’d resurface eventually.”

“We just didn’t know that he’d have his boyfriend in tow when he did,” Clint says mischievously and Tony’s stomach lurches painfully.

“Excuse me?” Rhodey says and Tony knows that tone, knows exactly how bad this is going to get, and he wants to run away, wants to get himself and Rhodey out of this conversation before it can actually get off the ground. But Rhodey is storming forward, not back towards the safety of the elevators and, not knowing what else to do, Tony follows. 

Clint, either not knowing about the danger of a pissed-off Colonel Rhodes or just not caring, rolls his eyes. “Oh come on. That display in the elevator? The fact that you can access the workshop when we can’t? And Tony’s insistence that he doesn’t date and that we need to stop trying to pry into his personal life? It all makes sense.” He grins at Rhodey. “You’re dating Tony Stark, aren’t you?”

“No, I am absolutely  _ not _ dating Tony,” Rhodey snaps. “Seriously, what the fuck? He’s not-” It’s only when Rhodey cuts himself off suddenly that Tony realizes how close his friend came to accidentally outing him. And even if Tony would normally be thrilled that Rhodey isn't calling their relationship "dating", because Tony has always hated that word, this time it does nothing to help his already-racing heart. 

“Not what?” Natasha asks, and her voice is cold and dangerous. “Not dating material? Good enough for you to sleep with, but not to date?”

“Not interested in dating me!”

“Are you sure, though?” Steve asks, stepping forward so Rhodey is trapped between super-soldier and super-assassins. 

Not that Rhodey couldn’t hold his own in a fight against the three but seriously?  _ Seriously? _

“What the hell you guys?” Tony says, finally finding his own voice through the panic that’s still threatening to overwhelm him. “Seriously, what the hell? Are you trying to defend me to one of my best friends? Are you trying to  _ set us up _ ? What is going on here?”

“Look, Tony, it’s obvious you have feelings towards Rhodes…” Steve begins.

“Yeah, friendly feelings as in, he’s my friend and I care about him!” Tony interrupts. “Is anyone going to even ask me about how I feel about dating Rhodey? Or are you all going to just keep jumping to the wrong fucking conclusion?”

“How do you feel about dating Rhodes?” Natasha asks dutifully, though she continues to glare at Rhodey as she speaks. 

“I don’t want to!” Tony all but yells. “I told you guys that I don’t date and that means  _ I do not date _ ! Not Rhodey, not  _ anyone _ !”

“You’re obviously sleeping with him, though,” Clint points out. 

“Ever heard of friends with benefits, Barton?” Rhodey snaps. “Or is your tiny bird-brain too small to actually comprehend that people can have sex without being romantically involved with each other?”

“Oh, bird-brain jokes, so original,” Clint says sarcastically. “It’s not like I’ve heard that, oh, a thousand fucking times before.”

“Just because you’re friends with benefits doesn’t mean you don’t want there to be something more,” Natasha cuts in. “I saw how you two were acting, Tony has never been like that around anyone else-”

This can’t be happening.

“Maybe because he’s been trying to avoid you guys misinterpreting-”

“Misinterpreting? How exactly are we misinterpreting-?”

This can’t be fucking happening. 

“He says he doesn’t want to date me and I don’t want to date him, so I don’t get why you guys are having a problem with this!”

Tony is standing right there, but everyone keeps talking over him like he’s not here. Like their opinion on his love-life is more important than what he actually has to say on the matter. He wants to scream, he wants to run away,  _ he wants this to fucking stop _ , because the clawing anxiety building in his throat couldn’t handle any more of this. 

“You’re not homophobic, are you?” Steve asks suddenly. “I know that's a thing, that some people internalize things- Tell me that’s not where this issue is-”

Rhodey gets a look of pure, unadulterated  _ rage _ on his face at Steve’s question. He takes a step forward, hands clenched into fists at his side and Steve is too stubborn to back down from a fight and-

“He’s not dealing with internalized homophobic, are you fucking serious right now?” Tony shouts. “He’s trying to be fucking considerate because  _ I’m aromantic  _ you fucking  _ amatonormative morons _ ! And, newsflash! I _am_ in a relationship with both him and Pepper, but it's completely platonic because they are the only two people in this entire fucking world who get that I don’t want to date! And I don't want to date because I don’t experience romantic attraction, and I don’t like romance  _ because I’m fucking romance-repulsed _ , so would you guys stop shoving it in my fucking face already!”

The room is suddenly completely silent in the wake of Tony’s outburst and Tony doesn’t care because he’s panicking and he’s pissed off and he is so tired of dealing with this bullshit, of dealing with his teammates thinking they know what’s best for him when they don’t, because they don’t even know-

Oh. 

Oh, god,  _ no _ . 

Tony replays what he just said in his head, and he doesn’t realize that he’s shaking until Natasha takes a tentative step forward with a quiet, “Tony?”

But Rhodey reaches him first, Rhodey who wraps an arm around Tony’s shoulders- because fuck it, displays of affection are obviously okay now considering  _ he just came out to his team _ and told them about his relationship- oh, god, he shouldn't have done that- and gently pushes him down onto a nearby chair. Tony grabs his arm and doesn’t let go because he needs one ally in this, one person who will have his back, because Steve looks shell-shocked and Clint is visibly horrified and Natasha’s face doesn’t show any emotion but somehow that makes it even worse.

“Oh. Well, crap,” Tony says faintly. “That… I didn’t mean to say that.”


	4. Chapter 4

The room is frighteningly, deafeningly silent. Tony doesn’t actually know if the communal floors of the Tower have been this quiet since the others moved in. He doesn’t know if he’s ever heard these people be so silent outside of covert missions. He has no frame of reference for how worryingly still the room has become, and his anxiety is not liking that one bit.

He wants to be anywhere else but here, but he’s about three minutes too late to make a quick escape. There’s no way he’s getting out of a conversation now, not with that outburst, but Tony can’t do this, he can’t do it, he can’t-

“Tony.” Rhodey is in front of him suddenly, his hands on Tony’s shoulders and leaning in far enough that he’s all Tony can see. “Are you okay?”

Tony laughs. He knows that’s the wrong reaction but he can’t stop laughing because god, _god_ how is any of this supposed to be okay?

He just came out to his teammates, to _the Avengers_. One angry outburst later and his secret is out, and-

And it kills Tony, but there is not a single part of him that expects this inevitable conversation to go well. Call it cynicism, call it being realistic- Fury would probably write it down in a file somewhere with a note about _not being a team player_ \- but Tony doesn’t see any way that this is going to end well for him.

“Tony,” Rhodey repeats quietly. “What do you need?”

For the last five minutes to be completely erased from all timelines. For his teammates to have never started focusing their attention on his non-existent love life. For them to never have moved back into the Tower in the first place-

No. That’s not fair. Tony likes having his teammates around. For all their insufferable, annoying habits- for as _simple_ as his life would be without them living with him- he doesn’t wish that they were gone.

“I want this fucking conversation to be over.” Tony scrubs at his face, and sighs. “C’mon, hit me you guys. You’ve got questions, I’ve got answers. Let’s do this shit.”

He finally looks up at his team and- yeah, okay, the looks on their faces do nothing to inspire confidence. But at least the pure horror from earlier seems to have given away to something like… like confused guilt, maybe. Tony doesn’t know if that’s necessarily better, but it’s at least _different_.

“Tony, if you’re uncomfortable, you don’t-” Steve begins, always trying to protect his teammates even if that means protecting them from himself.

Natasha, however, has no reservations about getting the information she so obviously wants. “What is aromantic?” she asks, cutting Steve off before he can finish his sentence. The look Steve sends her would be enough to get any minor villain to surrender, but she doesn’t even bat an eye at it.

Tony takes a deep breath. He can do this. Answering simple, direct questions is probably going to be the easy part anyway. “Aromantic is when you don’t experience romantic attraction,” Tony says. His voice is steadier than he thought it would be, but his heart is still racing painfully fast in his chest.

“I’m not- I haven’t done a whole lot of research on this, I’m not an expert or anything,” Tony admits. “I didn’t actually know that aromanticism was a thing, until I said some things to Pepper and she started Googling. But it’s always been this- this thing about me, just that I never loved people the way other people did. I never “fell in love”, I guess, I never felt love that was different than my platonic friendships. And it worked out okay because I was never comfortable with romantic gestures anyway, so-”

“That’s the romance-repulsed bit, right?” Steve interrupts.

Tony nods. “Yeah. Romance, it… it skeeves me out. Makes me super fucking uncomfortable, like my heart races and my skin feels like it’s crawling. I don’t _get_ romance, I don’t know when people are trying to be romantic and I don’t know how you’re supposed to act. I just- none of it makes sense to me because I don’t experience it, and then on top of it romance just makes me feel sick anyway so I never bothered trying to have relationships because I just never wanted them.”

“But if you dated people, you'd get better at picking up on those things,” Natasha says, and Tony grimaces.

“Yeah but I don't want to date people so I'm not gonna do that,” he says. “Why would I force myself into uncomfortable situations when I wouldn't get anything out of it?”

“You'd get the companionship-” Steve tries.

Tony shakes his head. “Not the kind I want. I have friends. I have this-" Tony waves his hand, "-I don't know, committed platonic relationship thing with Rhodey and Pepper. I don't want a romantic relationship, I don't _need_ a romantic relationship, so I'm not gonna try to pursue one.”

“I don't get this,” Clint announces. “I don't- how do you not love anyone? That's like a universal thing, loving people.”

“I do love people, just not romantically,” Tony says, clenching his hands together to stop them from shaking. “I love my friends, but it's not a romantic love. That's- that's how I am. That's how I've always been.”

“So there wasn't- I mean, something didn't happen and…” Steve flounders. His face is red, like he knows how bad his question is and is embarrassed to be asking it, but clearly that doesn't stop him from trying.

And it's not like Tony needs to hear Steve’s full question to know what he's trying to get at. “No. I know… For some people that's a thing, that they identify as aromantic because of trauma or mental illness, and there's nothing wrong with that, but I’m not- this isn't something that I became because something happened to me. This is who I am, this is always who I'm going to be, and I’m not-”

Tony is shaking, not small tremors but full-on quaking in his seat, more than can be hidden by just holding himself tense. He doesn’t know if its nerves or adrenaline or sheer _panic_ , but he can’t hold his body still. He needs to keep explaining but when he tries to force the words, no sounds come out. He knew that this was how the conversation was going to go, but now that he’s in the middle of it he doesn’t know how he’s supposed to keep talking when Steve and Natasha and Clint are just staring at him. Waiting to ask more questions, to demand more answers and information, to-

There are a thousand things he wants to say, so many facts he wants to share and justifications he wants to give and explanations that he can offer. He’s imagined this conversation so many times that he has almost memorized everything he could ever possibly say about his aromantic identity, but he can’t think of any of them now. The words stall out, get lost somewhere in the panic-fog of his brain, and he can’t-

“Tony.”

For the life of him, Tony cannot tell who it is who says his name first. It could be Rhodey, still standing beside him and squeezing his shoulder a little harder. It could be Steve, who at some point took a half-step forward, as if he went to reach out for Tony but stopped himself at the last minute. It could be Natasha, who’s glaring at Clint- who, in turn, looks defensive… but also mostly just guilty.

_They don’t hate you_ , he tells himself, even if it feels like a bit of a lie. _This doesn’t have to go badly_.

Because it would be so easy to end the conversation here, to smile and tell them that everything was fine. To walk away, and avoid the actual discussions that need to happen, and leave everything where it is.

But Pepper was right, and Tony is tired of feeling uncomfortable in his own home, and he can’t do this anymore.

“I don’t care what you think about this,” Tony starts, but no, that’s not right. “Wait, scratch that. I absolutely fucking care about what you guys think. Because you’re my friends, and this is who I am, and I can’t- you guys hating this part of me? Little bit of a deal-breaker.”

“We don’t hate you,” Clint says, and it’s because Clint who speaks up that Tony actually almost believes him.

Tony exhales slowly. “Okay. That’s- that’s good.”

“We’re confused,” Natasha tells him quietly. “This is new to us, and we want to understand.”

“And I get that, I do,” Tony says. “But I can’t… I’ll answer your questions, but I can’t sit here and have you pick apart my entire life until you’re satisfied with what I’m telling you. That’s not gonna happen. Google exists for a reason.”

“Says the man who never thought to Google this shit himself until Pepper did it first,” Rhodey mutters, and Tony can’t hold back his laugh.

“You know what, Rhodey? Screw you,” he says cheerfully. “I don’t have to research my own fucking life, and I do believe I prefaced this conversation by saying that I’m not the expert here. That would be Pepper, by the way-” Tony says to the other three. “-but maybe don’t text her aro questions out of the blue just yet.”

“That seems fair,” Steve says, and it’s not even meant as a joking comment. He’s taking the conversation seriously, they all are, and Tony can appreciate that- even if he doesn’t necessarily appreciate their intensity. “And I’m sorry if we’ve made you uncomfortable, Tony,” he continues. “That wasn’t… I didn’t want to do that. I don’t think any of us did.”

And before Tony can respond to that heartfelt apology, Natasha adds, “We’ve been doing that for a while now, I think. And I’m sorry about that too.”

Tony takes a deep breath. “Yeah. About that…”

It’s the part of the conversation that Tony absolutely does not want to have happen. But it’s also the part that’s the most necessary, because either Tony says this or nothing will change and this entire disaster of a coming-out would be completely pointless.

“The romantic talk? And the jokes about dating and trying to set me up and all that shit? It needs to stop,” Tony tells him. He hates this, hates having to stand up for himself in a way that’s genuine and serious rather than masked with a layer of cutting sarcasm and enlarged ego. “I get that that’s normal for you, that it’s normal for most people. I get that I’m an outlier here, I really do, but I can’t- I can’t keep getting dragged into conversations about people’s love lives. I can’t be part of your dating jokes anymore.”

“Does it bother you that much, really?” Clint’s tone is curious, not judgmental, and Tony is thankful for that.

“Yes, it does,” he says simply. “Like I said, I’m romance-repulsed. There is literal, actual repulsion about romantic things. If it’s on my terms, then I can handle it. But that shit that happened a few days ago? That can’t happen anymore. It just- it just can’t.”

Tony can’t give them an ultimatum, can’t tell them to leave him out of their romantic bullshit or get the fuck out of his Tower. He can’t even bring himself to tell them that he’ll be spending a lot more time down in workshop if this doesn’t change, because that’s not fair to them. It may be true, at least the workshop bit, but they’re still his friends, his teammates. He won’t emotionally manipulate them like that, even if it would make him feel more comfortable in his own home again.

But every single one of them, Natasha and Clint and Steve, are all nodding like this won’t be a problem at all. “We’ll try,” Steve tells him, and Tony wants to believe him so badly it almost hurts.

There’s no good way to end a conversation like this. There a moment of awkward silence, where everyone looks like they just want to bolt but they don’t know a good way to do that.

It’s Rhodey who saves the day, like he’s so good at doing. He pulls Tony to his feet and says, “Come on, let’s go call Pepper.”

Tony doesn’t miss the way Clint winces at that, but he waits until they’re in the safety of the elevator and heading back up to Tony’s floor before asking, “Did you just subtly threaten the Avengers with _Pepper_?”

“Is there a greater threat in this world than a pissed-off Pepper Potts?” Rhodey asks, and Tony just loses it.

It’s not even that funny of a quip, because actually it’s kind of scarily accurate, but Tony can’t seem to stop laughing. He leans against Rhodey for support as he just laughs and laughs, the stress from that conversation giving way to what probably sounds like hysteria, but he’s so far past the point of actually caring.

He stumbles out of the elevator, still gasping for breath and lets Rhodey lead him over to the living room and unceremoniously dump him down on the sofa.

“You good?” Rhodey asks when Tony’s laughter finally dies down enough for him to get a word in himself.

“God, who the fuck knows,” Tony tells him. “They do know now, right? Like that conversation wasn’t some strange fever-dream or something, it actually did happen?”

Rhodey leans down and presses the back of his hand to Tony’s forehead. “I don’t feel a fever, so it was probably real,” he says and Tony bats his hand away from his face. “Could be a shared hallucination, since I remember it too. Want to check with Jarvis though, just to be sure?”

“You fucking ass,” Tony says, but it comes out more fond than anything else. “Seriously, all I’m asking for is some emotional support-”

“Who are you and what have you done with Tony Stark?”

“-and this is the sort of bullshit I have to deal with instead,” Tony continues, ignoring Rhodey’s interruption completely. “What have I done to deserve such treatment?”

“Now who’s being a fucking ass?” Rhodey says with a laugh. Tony shoves at him, the attempt completely ineffective given his current position on the couch, and Rhodey just laughs even harder.

Tony grins and it feels natural, it feels okay, and some of his lingering anxiety starts to bleed away.

He knows that one conversation isn’t going to be enough to make the others understand, and that things won’t magically change overnight. But his teammates are still his friends, and until they find a new equilibrium Tony at least still has Rhodey and Pepper on his side. And speaking of which…

“Were you serious about calling Pepper?” Tony asks, pushing up so he’s mostly vertical. “Because I, for one, do not know if I can handle that conversation.”

“Talking to Pepper will be fine,” Rhodey tries to assure him, but it’s so obviously a lie that Rhodey can’t even keep a straight face. “Okay, no, telling Pepper what happened will probably go terribly but you have to do it.”

“Why?” Tony says, drawing out the word into a slight whine just to make Rhodey wince. “She’s just going to want to come back to New York early and strangle the Avengers.”

“Well, yes,” Rhodey admits. “But not telling her would be so much worse. Because she will find out eventually, and then not only will she want to strangle the Avengers but she will also want to strangle _both of us_ for not looping her in on what went down.”

Its Tony’s turn to wince at that. “Yeah, oh god, yeah not updating her on this would be- wow yeah, okay let’s give her a call. Jarvis-”

Rhodey covers Tony’s mouth with his hand. “We don’t have to call right now, though,” he says gently. “We can, maybe, focus on something other than this for a few minutes first.”

And Tony wants to protest that no, he doesn’t need time to cool down from that conversation… but that would be a lie. Because Tony can’t get the image out of his mind of his teammates looking at him like he’s something broken, even if none of them said that word aloud. Because the anxiety hasn’t completely gone away. Because this will change everything, even if his teammates don’t think it will. Things will be different, but Tony doesn’t know exactly how things will go, and that’s… that’s not something he can just brush aside.

He pulls Rhodey’s hand away from his face and asks, “Can we just… watch horrible movies and get fucking shit-faced drunk, and pretend that today hasn’t happened?”

It’s barely one in the afternoon, too early to be socially acceptable to drink, and too early for Tony to be feeling this exhausted. And ignoring the situation isn’t a great coping mechanism, but the next time Tony leaves his rooms he won’t be able to ignore it and right now he needs that reprieve.

Rhodey knows that, and he doesn’t even bat an eye at Tony’s request. “Sure thing, Tones,” he says. “You want company on that couch, or should I take the chair?”

Tony still has Rhodey, and still has Pepper, and their status quo hasn’t changed. And in that moment, Tony is so grateful for that that he could actually _cry_.

“Couch is fine,” he says. “But stay at the other end.”

Rhodey nods. “Let me grab the beer first. Get a movie going, would you?”

“Yeah, of course,” Tony says, but the moment Rhodey’s back is turned he closes his eyes, takes one deep breath, a second one, releases them slowly and takes a moment to breathe before doing anything else.

Things are different, and he feels different, and he doesn’t know what to do with that. But he knows that if he wants to cuddle with Rhodey in a few hours, his friend will still let him without question and without expectations. Tomorrow, he’ll deal with the others. Tomorrow, and the next day, and the rest of the week and next month and this entire year. He’ll deal with them, and maybe things won’t get better, but maybe… maybe they will.

Tony doesn’t know how this will turn out, and he hates not knowing, but there’s no other option here.

Maybe, when he calls Pepper, he’ll get her to send him some links that he can throw at his teammates when they start asking too many questions. Or maybe he’ll follow-through with Rhodey’s thinly-veiled threat to the others and just sic her on the Avengers. Force them to learn everything about aromantic identities through professional-crafted PowerPoint presentations.

He snorts at the mental image because god, that is so tempting.

“Everything okay?” Rhodey asks, nudging Tony’s legs until he pulls them up so there’s space at the other end of the couch for Rhodey to sit.

“Yeah,” Tony says, and it doesn’t feel like as much of a lie as he was expecting. “Yeah, I think it is.” He grins at Rhodey and snags a beer for himself. “So, what do you want to watch?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end of this story. I may write a sequel or two, dealing with the rest of the Avengers learning more and asking Tony questions, but I wanted to end this one here because, in my experience, coming out doesn't ever have a tidy ending. Especially for identities that are harder to explain. You have one conversation, but you keep dealing with it afterwards. You answer more questions, and correct microaggressions that you can now call out, and there isn't always a simple happy ending. 
> 
> Having Tony stick up for himself and assert his boundaries was important to me. But the trade-off was that, for this particular story, the loose ends of his relationships with the rest of the Avengers don't get neatly wrapped up because they can't reach a new status quo in a single conversation. 
> 
> I hope this is an ending that, at the very least, feels realistic. And thank you everyone who has been reading, commenting, and/or leaving kudos. I appreciate them all and seriously, thank you so much1

**Author's Note:**

> Tony's experiences/feelings as a bisexual, romance-repulsed aromantic are based heavily on my own and I have no shame in that. 
> 
> This story started out as two different fics that I ended up merging into one. I think, with the heavy editing, it will work but if anything is super contradictory or feels out of place please let me know!


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